A question I get a lot as a dating coach is: “If you could summarize everything you teach into one single tip, what would it be?” It’s actually pretty easy for me to summarize. Let’s jump right into it.
1. One Single Statement
In all of life, we look at our financial well-being, our relationships, we look at our personal health and I can sum up all of this into this one statement:
“We as human beings must rewire our scarce behavior and mindsets into abundant behaviors and mindsets.” ~ Aaron Alexander
2. Now How Do We Get Abundance?
So one of the easiest ways that you can start having an abundance of women in your life is by acting as though you already have and abundance of women in your life. “But Aaron I get it, I’m supposed to just act like I have a bunch of women but it’s hard because blah blah blah.” No! In virtually every decision that you make in your life from this moment forward I want you to pretend as though you currently on your cell phone are texting 10 gorgeous girls. Your 10 perfect girls are texting you right now. They are blowing up your phone. They are dying to come over. They want to have sex with you. They want to go on dates with you. They enjoy you. They want to be in a relationship with you. And so now if you can really imagine that, put yourself in that headspace then. Now that 10 gorgeous women are blowing up your phone how are you going to behave when you are texting a woman? When you’re talking to a woman in person? When you are going back and forth with a woman to set up plans?
Well… you’re sure as shit not gonna say anything needy. If anything you’re gonna almost intentionally say things that are going to repel her because at the end of the day it would be cool to hang out with one girl to an extent, but I mean you would just rather move along. It’s almost too much work at this point because you’re living in such an abundance! Next thing you know you’re doing very little and now the women are investing more into you. So every day ask yourself: “How would I behave if I had ten gorgeous girls blowing up my phone?” And then do that.
3. The Four Levels Of Skill In Game
So taking what I just talked about so far let’s look at guys that are just texting these girls way way too much. Being overly invested, engaging in these long-form text conversations. So many women are just using men for validation to feel good about themselves because they have nothing better to do. And what you do as a needy guy that’s living in scarcity is you sit there and you text her back and you go along with these conversations that and that inherently shows that you have a lack of boundaries, no really much going on, and neediness. Hell in that kind of scenario if the girl wasn’t using you for validation she wouldn’t even be talking to you. And you allow this, you put up with this. All in the name of desperation.
Another example is when a girl asks you to hang out or you say to a girl i want to hang out and she says: “well when are you free?” Now here’s the deal. This is abiding by the law of attraction. So in this universe that we’re living in right now, we attract not what we want, not what we need, not what we desire, but rather we attract what we are. So if you do not behave in an abundant manor then you will not be attracting abundance. It’s not that you can’t get women it’s that your behavior is literally preventing women from being attracted to you. You are repelling the very thing that you want with your behavior. And It is such a paradox. It could be hard at first but over time what happens is you move through the four levels of skill in the game:
1. Unconscious Incompetence
2. Conscious Incompetence
3. Conscious Competence
4. Unconscious Competence
So beginning with unconscious incompetence. This is where you don’t even know that you’re not good at a skill. This is when you’re the least aware. Then you discover the game. You discover my content and you discover that you’re incompetent and now you’re consciously incompetent. You’re still not good at the skill, but at least now you know that you’re not. Then what happens if you start adopting these abundant behaviors that I am explaining, you begin to improve your skill and become consciously competent. This is when you start getting consciously good at the skill, however there is an even higher level. At some point you will reach the final level where these behaviors become who you are and now you’re acting as though you’re in abundance and thus attracting abundance automatically and then you become unconsciously competent. Now you’re just a man that is great with women and there’s nothing that anybody can do to tell you otherwise. It doesn’t take lots of effort for you to maintain the skill as it is all happening unconsciously now. This is the holy grail to reach for in pickup. It’s when you start really walking through life with ease. And it’s what I want for all of you. So start living in abundance and climbing the ladder until you reach this point.